The Commissar and the cat
by 123132123132123
Summary: For a lol of a mate. Enjoy is if you want though. (OC x Imperial Guard cause no Commissar character


**Before you begin to read, this story will be posted on a different account in order to keep my main account from being related to this story as it's for a specific reason. I also don't have much knowledge of the Warhammer series, especially the Mechanicus and Commissars, but I tried to keep it as relevant as possible, even if the names being used seem somewhat... odd. As I said, this is for a specific reason. Anyway, hope you enjoy, and to Imperial, have fun :)**

Chapter 1: The first meeting.

Being a Commissar isn't easy. Being a commissar to a bunch of incompetent Guardsman conscripts being trained on Mars is worse. After the transfer to this godforsaken rock things have only been getting worse over time, and the field exercises have been no help. While the pathetic lot of what could hardly be called soldiers are no where near the worst I've had to whip into shape, they sure are no Tempestus Scions. As I walked back to my quarters after another semi-successful excessive I hung my coat up next to my door, threw my hat on the nearby desk and dropped face down onto the bed that, for some reason seemed surprisingly comfortable. I then rolled over and grabbed a small device from my desk. Activating it caused a small red light to appear near it's mirror like screen.

I then began to speak, seeing the words I spoke appear on said screen. "Commissar Imperialswordz, log: 1540, rotation recording: 129th planet rotation. Today's exercise could be considered a success, if failing to assemble an artillery gun, twice, losing two team members in the red valley, twice and having a guardsman break his helmet straps, twice, count as a success. On top of all of that my Bolt pistol seems to have a slight malfunction. As I went to fire it in the air to scare those fuckers into action it's chamber ejection system failed, meaning the shell of the round I fired went flying with the round, grinding down the barrel. So tomorrow I'll have to go into the mechanicus workshop and get it replaced." I then sat up, scratching the top of my head. "Back to the subject at hand however, they have been getting better. Maybe tomorrow Conscript Mathews will be able to field strip his lasgun. I do fear for the regiment they are placed with, especially if it's the 1998th Field Gun Regiment. Other than that, nothing else to report. Commissar Imperial, ending recording."

As I clicked the small button on the side of the device once again, the red light faded away, leaving me with a lifeless machine in my hands. Placing back on the desk I drew my bolt pistol from it's holster to inspect it. Making sure the magazine was removed, the chamber was clear and safety was on I did the one thing only an idiot would do. Look down the barrel. As I said in the recording, the barrel seemed to be as smooth as the round it had, with the edge being as sharp as an Inquisitors tongue. Letting out a heavy sigh I placed the bolt pistol on the desk with it's needed components, proceeded to remove my boots and holster and dropped back down onto the bed, allowing sleep to overtake me, hoping tomorrow would be better than today.

"Good Morning Commisar Imperial!" Of course the first person I would see today would be the one reliable member of the conscripts, Franklin Kreig, a man who shared a surname identical to the name of a planet horrible for it's holiday resorts. "Good morning conscript. I'm sure you, and the others are ready to fail again today?" He flashed a cocky grin in response to my attempt at small talk. "Fail at disappointing you and the trainers Commissar. I'll see you in a few hours." "Indeed Conscript. If only the others had the same determination." As I began walking away I swore I heard a slight chuckle from behind, as if Franklin took that as a challenge.

A few minutes later I reached my destination, the mechanicus workshop. More specifically, the workshop assigned to repairing combat equipment for the training on mars. Walking through the door I was met with a familiar sight, a cyborg human of the mechanicus, sitting behind a bench, messing with what appeared to be a lasgun. I approached the desk and the man raised his head to meet my gaze. "Good morning Commissar, to what do we owe the pleasure?" His mechanical voice was not comforting, but I knew he meant well. "During yesterday's training exercise my bolt pistol encountered a problem. Mainly a failure of shell ejection, causing the shell of the round to follow through, grinding the barrel down. I was wondering if I could get a replacement barrel so I may continue my duties." I handed him the weapon and he took it from me, gently cradling it in his hands as if it where a child.

He flipped it to and fro, inspecting it's outside. He then placed it onto the desk, removing several parts in but a few seconds flat, a task that would take me at least a minute. Having removed the barrel he then proceeded to inspect it, frowning upon inspecting the inside. He then turned his gaze to me. "You will need more than a replacement barrel Commissar. That shell not only grinded the barrel down, it melted it, most likely due to heat? Possible friction? Can't say for certain. Just take the door the over there and speak to our supply master. She'll help you in finding a new bolt pistol." He pointed towards a small door that led towards what appeared to be a storage area. Giving him a quick nod I proceeded towards said door.

As I entered I was met with a sight that was expected of a storage room. A large room, at least three-hundred by three-hundred meters, it was filled with shelve units and enough boxes to pack up an entire cities population and move them elsewhere. I looked up, seeing the roof reach nearly a hundred meters in the air. Getting my mind back on track I began to look around, trying to find this supply master. Walking down the room, peeking into a few aisles I saw nothing. I continued, still nothing, but I could hear... something. As small noise that sounded almost like boots on the metal ground. I kept walking down the room, trying to find the source of said noise, not expecting it to find me.

In but a few seconds I found myself knocked straight onto my ass, with a small amount of weight sitting on my chest. As I groaned from the impact I heard a similar noise emanating from the small weight on my chest. My eyes shot open to be met with something I never even thought I would see. It was human, I think. But, it had ears. Cat ears. And what appeared to be a tail. A REAL tail. I also noticed that it's left arm was identical to it's right, but the left one was entirely metal. As this thing on me rose it's head I realised it was a woman. She opened her eyes slowly, but they quickly shot open and she leaped off me, blushing so red you could mistake her for a blood raven. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She repeated over and over. "I didn't see you there. I was so focused on finding a bolt pistol for you I forgot you would even be coming in here!" I still felt dumbfounded as to what happened it took me a moment to register I was still on the ground, getting back onto my feet I noticed that this woman was a head shorter than me, and I was only 6'1 so she was quite short.

It took me another moment more to realise she was still quite flustered about the incident that just took place "If only I spent less time in the clouds I would be more aware to the situation at hand. I don't even know how I was able to join the mechanicus if I'm this clums-" "Woah, woah, slow down, it's alright. You don't need to worry about it." She stopped speaking as soon as I said this, giving me an all too hopeful look "Really?" "Y-yes. I'm not going to report you or anything." She let out a heavy sigh, and gave me a look of relief. "Oh, thank goodness. Emperor knows what would happen if I got in trouble AGAIN. Now, let's go about finding you that bolt pistol. Quickly, follow me!" As she sped off down one of the aisles she grabbed my hand, not even giving me a choice in the matter.

As I followed her down the long aisle as she checked box after box I had to ask her about her odd appearance. "If you don't mind me asking, why do you have feline ears and a tail?" She turned to face me and then looked at her tail. Giving me a quick smile she responded "Well, it's how I was born. I come from a planet I don't even know the name of, but apparently all the natives share an appearance similar to mine." As she continued searching and speaking I took a quick moment to inspect her. Strictly on the grounds of business. Her body, while small seemed to carry some rather appealing... traits. She was also rather attractive in terms of beauty, and her hair, a dark jet black only complimented her. As I averted my gaze before it became rude to stare began listening to her once again. "And after that, the guardsman took me to an Inquisitor. Seeing that I was 'technically' normal, excluding my rather... odd extras, I was assigned to the mechanicus due to my high level skill with machines and technology. While I was here I was given this robo arms to help with my duties."

Pulling out one last box she let out a content "Ahh" and pulled what appeared to be a brand new bolt pistol, complete with leather holster. "This is a newly made Garm Pattern bolt pistol. Same as your old one, only this one has a leather holster made by yours truly." Letting out a small chuckle she continued. "Funny, I was brought here to help make machines, yet all I've done is work storage and make this little leather strap. Either way, take care of her and she'll take care of you." Shoving the weapon and holster in my hands she dragged me back to the exit. Before I knew it she was pushing me out, saying "Thank you for stopping by Commissar, but I do have a LOT to do today, so if you could please leave I would be most thankful."

Before she could shove me out I found my impulses overtake me, making me do a 180 I asked her something I'd never thought I'd ask a member of the meachanicus. "Wait, I didn't catch your name." She gave me a look that was identical to how I felt, utterly confused, but a short second later she gave me a warming smile and said "The mechanicus named me Nekodoom. It was nice meeting you Commissar...?" "Imperial. Imperialswordz." With that she gave me a bigger smile and said "Nice meeting you Commissar Imperial. Have a great day." She then turned around, and ran off, getting back to work. Feeling utterly confused I looked down to the weapon and holster in my hand. A small smile crossing my lips I whispered to myself "Maybe this job won't be as bad as I thought."

Chapter 1 end

 **Remember everyone reading this, this is has all been done with hate in order to keep the joke this is about relevant. I also find that my writing skills suck ass so I won't be writing anything other than this. (Also, I'm not the old owner of this account, my mate traded this off to me so I didn't have to have my email connected to an account. Should have mentioned that before. We just have a similar writing style is all.)**


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